The Free Land

The free land - u dnt knw wat to xpect, u jus like d name that's what has brought you to the free land. U r welcomed by an IVR "hello,please choose ur name". Not that we don't like our names but what would be ur name had it not been what was given to you ? IVR repeats its welcome "hello ,ur free to choose any name ud like !". Dis time it throws my brain to the question of will changing my name change my identity ?  I cudnt b affirmative so I choose 'Aansh',I dnt knw d meaning of it I dnt knw y I want it jus mayb coz dats d 1st thing dat came to me or as a human brain I chose d letter A !  OR mayb dis Is wat being free means ! I smile letting my 1st brush wid freedom sink in a little. I ask "can I change it again" , depends on ur mood sir ur free to.  I walk around looking at people wondering what is it that dey wanted to b free from ?  The lands basic premise was to not judge ,not assume. Jus BE n let BE. In being n letting ppl be d basic of a safe environment hence becomes d priority ,so dere wud be no killing. No "oh I fancy so I kill " madness  You r born. Yes u r jus born. We didn't get to choose what who where when anythin we jus arrive. Some lucky some not so lucky. But wrs d freedom ?  Its here on The free land  Dis is like a new you. No one knows u no one wants to knw u !  Ur free to choose d way u live. Dere is no society , dere is no rat race , dere is no fight to eat.  Schools churning out kid to b serve. A few rich get served who in turn serve d bigger rich ppl.  Its a vicious cycle ! U breakthrough bt den u dnt understand dat u never do !  Ur right dere doing it day in n out. Unless u giv up or d world gives up on u. We thought growing up meant freedom !  Alas d biggest lie we were made to live.  Aansh - a new name a new me , I dnt have to live for anyone I live for myself.  Even I don't knw who iam !! N its a happy feeling :) its lik open to this world open to watever this one life has to offer. Restart afresh new. Soak in al d gud jus live for d day live free.

this ones for your lovely smile

haaashhhhhhhh :) this is moments after u log off n kya kahyal still playing. For long i have a wish to write a thing bout u ,but alas if i write and if you wudnt read it then its of not much use right ? iam a leo after all :).

so people this is a story that just happened .we for the better half of our life plan the life that's going to unfold trying to have a say ,trying to win a upper hand over this strange phenomenon that's life and emotions but alas i find my self as one of those fortunate ones that did experience bizarre ,the pleasantness of the occurring left me in the awe of all that took its course all so naturally. i shared all the excitement all the fears all the bewilderment but it kept unfolding. It took me and her to levels we never ever thought were possible , to the point that we still struggle to grapple with the fact that wow ! it is real :)

Acquaintance - friends and a .(full stop) thats what it was for all the time we had the oppurtunity to go everywhere that's all that it was back then :o. 

For all those who start reaching to conclusions reading this .let me shatter your assumption that i do not desire any consequence ,no i dont want a result .for this once i have with conscious effort lived with this feel.like all humans i faltered ,even she has but i live happy in this feel,probably more happy about the fact that this something special happened while we wait for it all the while. 

for if u wondering that is this so strong a feel here is it the same there ? id say yes,she would say yes  :) . n even if its a no i already said i dont want a consequence :p . for the very fact that this is here and i speak of it its worth every feel i went through :)

so as destiny may have it ,it shall. for now gal we are good :D all my love .

THERE ARE MANY GOD BUT ONLY ONE SACHIN

Tickets booked for your match on 20.04.2011 MI vs PW @ wankhade ur booking id is : 123456789 Thank you for booking you tickets with bookmyshow.com !!!!! here i was staring at this text i got from my friend wondering shud i bless him or curse him !! Bless him for the obvious kind ans oh so thoughtful reasons and curse him for the call that followed that text which was less inviting and more on the threatening side asking me to make my presence felt on time on that day or else the consequences will not be bearable :o ,the threat was valid if you look into my past records.
Late night of 19.04.2011- i had completely forgot that a match awaits-no tickets ,no planning,friend frantically trying to get through while i was on a long call .Finally we talked n i was threatened again and i said ok il be there dont know how which train but il be there for your 4pm match.

20.04.2011- 7am "im too late for the 7:15 train" sleep..8am " shit man even 8:30 gone,il surely get the 9:45am " next i wake up at 9:10 "fuk fuk fuk...m not making it today "i call him and before i say a word there's this barrage of new innovative highly skilled guy abusing the living life out of me!! scared i log on to indianrailways.gov.in i bless my lord there was a train at 10:45 which will let me reach the stadium just in time .i finally did catch that train and i reached Wankhade at 3:45pm.The atmosphere right from the churchgate was Electric and blue ...i was here as a PUNE warrior supporter ,Sachin has the right to toy with anything he wants so besides him all was BLACK for the PW for me.

Gate No.4 Sachin Tendulkar stand - Thats where we had our tickets booked .My dear gentle friend arrived half an hour late and by the time i sat PW were 34-4 !! what a sad start ..but there he was god with his Orange cap on marching his troops ..1st ball - you look around the stadium its a sea of blue with the chants M-A-L-I-N-G-A in the background as this weird hairdo guy with a deadly yorker fired one right in to Uthapa,safely played down dead to the pitch.
Match it self wasnt a scorcher went on in a slow pace slow even by T20 standards .Chasing down 119 as a target did not even excite The craftsman but he sure didn't disappoint as there were a few glorious on drives few pulls a nice cover drive and the he holed out in the deep trying to clear the field. Content i had seen HIM bat the match was over for me .
I had this wild idea while talking to my cousin and iam actually thinking of doing it save enough for 2015 World cup and team travel ..what say ppl !!

IRRELEVANCE RULING

POST 2ND OF APRIL LIFE AGAIN GOT BACK TO THE SAME MODE OF IRRELEVANCE -STRONG WORD BUT SUITS THE FRAME OF MIND IAM IN.IN-CASE UR STILL WONDERING AS TO HOW WAS 2ND APRIL IMPORTANT - INDIA BECAME THE WORLD CHAMPIONS ON THAT DAY AND FOR THE NEXT 4 YEARS NOTHING GOIN 2 CHANGE DIS FEEL ,1992 1996 1999 2003 2007 QUITE A WAIT FOR ME AND A MILLION OTHERS(NOT BILLIONS FOR SURE).

I DON'T QUITE LIKE THIS TUSSLE GOING ON IN ME .I WORK ALMOST 9-9 MAINLY COZ AFTER 9PM I DNT QUITE HAV MUCH OF A AFTER WORK LIFE OR PPL TO MEET AND WORKIN FOR DIS REASON DOESNT MAKE ME FEEL COMFORTABLE COZ I SHUDVE BEEN TALKIN GROWTH N PROFITS AS REASONS.THIS IS WHERE THE IRRELEVANCE SPRINGS FROM WHY IS SUDDENLY EVERYTHING NOT SO IMPORTANT.I KNOW MY JOB IAM GOOD IT AT IT, I DO IT WELL TOO BUT DATS WAT IT STAYS FOR ME A "JOB TO BE DONE" CANT ATTACH ANYTHING MORE TO IT.
7 YRS FIERCELY INDEPENDENT YEARS CAN TAKE QUITE A TOLL ON UR FAMILY RELATIONS !! MAN ASK ME !! MY HABITS I GUESS ARE MORE TO BE BLAMED THAN ANYTHING ELSE.WHATEVER THEY SAY I DONT KNOW WHY I FIND IT IRRELEVANT!! MOM TRIES TO BREAK THE ICE ON MARRIAGE PART N HELL BREAKS LOOSE ..HAHAHA ..AGAIN I FIND DAT IRRELEVANT AT DIS STAGE IN MY LIFE WITH A COUPLE OF COUSINS ELDER TO ME IL PLAY SAFE !!
SOUND LIKE A LOOSER BUT I'AM NOT COZ IAM QUESTIONING MYSELF N WORKING ON HOW 2 CHANGE DIS FEEL ,SETTING NEW BIZ TARGETS,WILL WORK ON MY EXTRA CURRICULAR ACTIVITIES ,PLANNING TO GET BACK TO PLAYING CRICKET.SO LETS SEE HOW I FEEL IN A MONTHS TIME.
HOPEFULLY ALIVE N BUZZING .

This was poted to me as message by my sickle friend AMIKAR ANAND

This piece says alot,infact it shouts out the state we are


life in technicolor reminds me of a very cold dark morning on the highway coming back from baner on your trusty old yamaha, shrieking curses at the bone breaking wind and talking of how warm poha awaited us somewhere...watching the video on your laptop...saying cheers at carnival.
if technology ever progresses far enough to enable us to make photographs of the memories in our heads these would be among the first i send to Kodak...
sometimes i think there should be an upper ceiling on the fun people can have during higher studies man! its difficult to cope afterward, but then again im glad there isnt, life would never be Eastman color let alone technicolor.
this is what guys like us do, we are like memory making machines pushing ourselves towards the birth of that next special one and when life moves on, like it seems to have now, we feel inefficient and wasted.
a very old freind of mine once said in an alcoholic outburst of super sensitivity ; every drop of booze that hasnt got a memory to it is a drop of good booze wasted...saala who says drunks cant think straight? it was one of the most insightful lines i have ever heard that didn't come from a dead American
president or a morbid Greek philosopher!
im lying here awake listening to coldplay knowing how smoothly life has taken another turn and all that we do in the name of social networking is but a feeble attempt to keep a memory alive, all we have in our heads is a last photo of one another, jitu biting down on a vadapav outside dilip bhau as rajiv looks on in the backgound all forlorn, a pic of you laughing your head off from a moment afterwards...ankit covered in blankets dead asleep and kutub slumped in the bean bag looking into his laptop...khatri rushing in drenched to the bone in torrential rain and wearing my jacket giving me a reason to stay back and get drunk again...sumit bellowing hysterically trying to explain why team india is part of sachin and not the other way round as we sit in carnival, our faces in shadow but the soft light glinting off the ice as blue smoke curls into nothingness...
songs have immense emotive power, they span great distances yeas altogether.life in technicolor has begun for the umpteenth time and i know i can go on writing but tomorrow is again knocking on my door, so i leave you here friend till someday this reminiscence strikes again and i am compelled to write..  

untill then
farewell     

premier !!

Hello..this is my first blog and its a strange feel coz i write as if i talk to an audience !! i mean i say hello as if ill get a reply but there aint gonna be any hi coming back here,so before i plunge into this erratic journey of posting blogs where one post would or could voice a 100 sentiments , iam a novice so please bear with me.Well this stage of life iam being ruled by monotonony. Back during the days (wow time does fly),i would have narrated stories which would have ranged anythin from wierd to wild to crazy to hilarious to cool.Alcohol being the in d lead role aptly supported by loads of dope.There was this girl too which we may talk about later on.What i write will come across as light read stuff primarily because i dnt beleive in luggage.Time heals everything and we dont have much time then why waste time sulking rather be happy and keep ppl around you happy.As you can see i dnt hav any issues raging in my heart to debate for or against right now. so such piece of work is often a result of boredom,which these days seems to be a common thread binding so many people of my age,facebook will prove me right.But as and when i do have sumthin inresting to debate about i assure u u will find my insights intresting.
Coming back to life(always makes me think of the song),This shift from all independent nomad life to all work life with a certain decorum quitely forcing its way in hasnt been smooth at all.Sleep is revered but more than that for people lik me people are revered ,just 2 brief u up as to y i said so, after spendin 7 long yrs in heaven with the name Pune,with buddies i can never depend on !!!!  now Iam here in surat running this family SBU(volutarily),dont have a entertaining after work company to be with.This social emptiness is just so unnerving at times.Chilling aka Addabazi is missed the most,wish it could earn us money we would have been rich and life would have so smooth.Coz for that there is money rules us all !!
Man these hangovers have become such a part of my daily routine ..something needs to be done..not a pleasant feeling to wake up and walk holding onto walls !!!i would have given this post a smooth end but the hangover's not letting me think straight so..later then ..hope fully with somthin more substanial to voice !!